Divorce Reality Check! – By Raleigh divorce lawyer Attorney Carole Gailor

NC — (JusticeNewsFlash.com) Carole Gailor, a Raleigh, North Carolina divorce lawyer educates consumers and prospective divorce clients about unrealistic expectations in divorce cases.All too often people who hire a lawyer to represent them in a divorce case either misunderstand the lawyer’s role or have unrealistic expectations. These unrealistic expectations can result in significant disappointment and dissatisfaction. It is the lawyer’s job to help the client manage expectations. It is the client’s job to listen and adopt realistic expectations rather than blaming the lawyer, the courts or their spouse if things do not go the client’s way.

Unrealistic Expectations: Many clients seeking a divorce lawyer will bring with them a completely unrealistic set of expectations. These expectations can come from lack of knowledge about the law , the legal process or the cost or from motives such as anger and vindictiveness. It is the lawyer’s job to educate their client about the law applicable to the facts of the client’s case and to educate him or her about the legal process. If the lawyer fails to educate the client about the law and legal process, the client should be proactive and ask to be educated on the law and legal process.

The Angry or Vindictive Client:  More difficult is the client whose motives in a divorce case are based on anger or vindictiveness or has adopted a victim mentality. The goal of a client motivated by anger or vindictiveness is to inflict pain on the opposing party and/or make the process costly. Fairness is not a goal for this client. If the angry or vindictive client does not get the hoped for result, he or she will accuse the lawyer of failing to zealously represent him or her, accuse the judge of bias, the opposing party of lying, refuse to pay for legal services or file a grievance and focus blame anywhere but on himself or herself and the actions that led to the divorce.

The “Victim” Client: The client who insists on being the “victim” seldom views success in terms less than total victory. Victory or success in the courtroom is seen as the moral equivalent of personal vindication for the “victim’ client. Conversely, failure or a less than total victory is rationalized away as the lawyer’s fault or failure to be competent in some manner. There is rarely any satisfaction for the client motivated by unrealistic emotional expectations.

Reality Check: Both lawyers and clients need to evaluate, as objectively as possible, a prospective client’s emotional state and motives in considering representation. Frankly, a good lawyer will not represent a client whose motive is to inflict unnecessary pain, harm or cost to the opposing party. The wise lawyer will not represent a client whose role as a “victim”  has overtaken logic and a reasonable degree of objectivity

Contributor: Carole S. Gailor. Carole S. Gailor, a Raleigh Family Law Attorney is a leading North Carolina divorce lawyer and is experienced in all areas of family law representation. Carole Gailor is a Board Certified Family Law Specialist and a Fellow in the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. She frequently educates lawyers and other professionals on family law issues as well as business valuation. Carole is the senior partner in the Raleigh, North Carolina divorce law firm of Gailor, Wallis & Hunt, 1101 Haynes Street, Suite 201, Raleigh, North Carolina. Tel: (919) 832-8488. Website: www.gailorwallishunt.com

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